Tamworth vs Tottenham: FA Cup third round | FA Cup

7 minutes: Maddison sends Sarr away. Werner and Moore find Brennan Johnson, and it’s a poor attempt. A 3g pom pom?

5 minutes: The Spurs get possession with the 3g, which looks a little sketchy. Isn’t that what happens when your phone goes to “E” and you know you’re going to get something?

3 minutes: Corner forced after Porro finds Reguillon. Maddison shoots and Jas Sing, the goalkeeper, saves well and a short counterattack follows. The result is a throw and Tom Tonks will start it. It’s cleared up.

1 minute: And the first shot is from Tamworth whose left winger storms over the edge of the penalty area and forces Kinsky to make a save. The attacker’s name? Beck-Ray Besongbap Enoru, he comes from Cameroon.

Ange gives it back to the hoons and laughed away. In the goal net Tamworth The goalkeeper and his tallest defender are glued to the net again. Oh, this is wonderful stuff. All we need is Jimmy Hill to take over.

The goal nets appear to have been tampered with. Behind Ange there are, to quote Alf Stewart, a lot of bloody idiots making a nuisance of themselves and making it big.

The teams enter the field. It looks like brass monkeys Tamworth. James Maddison leads the team discussion in the Tottenham duel.

It’s narrow in the tunnel, and Ange Postecoglou looks determined. The 3g pitch beckons.

Bob Andrews, the Tamworth ChairmanHe spoke to the BBC: “It’s the biggest day in the club’s history. We thought Wembley were good in the FA Vase but this tops it all. To have a Premier League club of this size in Tamworth is fantastic. It’s just nice to bring the whole audience here. I wish we could get more in, but we’re at capacity.

“The money from this game will help us develop the site ourselves. We need better changing rooms, we need a stand at the bottom – we need different things. It’s neat, but it needs to be modernized.”

How were the changing rooms? Timo Werner seems to be cheerful when he explains that in Germany it is always the smaller team that hosts the cup game.

Tamworth: Singh, Crompton, Cullinane-Liburd, Hollis, Cockerill-Mollett, Tonks, Milnes, McLinchey, Morrison, Enoru, Creaney. Substitutes: Phillips, Curley, Digie, Fletcher, Finn, Wreh, Williams, Tshikuna, Sundire.

Reguilon, Sarr, MaddisonJohnson, Werner, Moore in, Djed Spence, Son, Solanke, Kulusevski and Bergval out, with Bentancur also on the sidelines. Kinsky stays in goal.

Tottenham: Kinsky, Porro, Dragusin, Gray, Reguilon, Sarr, Bissouma, Maddison, Johnson, Werner, Moore. Subs: Austin, Spence, Dorrington, Bergvall, Olusesi, Kulusevski, Son, Solanke, Lankshear.

Here is Ben Fisher’s excellent story Tamworth FC.

Nickname: The Lambs.

For slaughter? Let’s see.

Tamworth, a bustling, proud market town in the West Midlands steeped in history, whose most famous son, the Archdrude Julian Cope, plays host to the mighty Tottenham. They are 16th in the National League so play a decent level of football, so Ange’s boys can do things in their own way. A thin squad is being rotated after the tough night against Liverpool in the FA Cup. This is the matchup of the round for those who like to see the minnows host the elite.

Kick-off is at 12:30pm UK time. Join me.